Ask Dr. NerdLove: My Boyfriend Is Poly… And I’m Maybe Maybe Maybe Not

Ask Dr. NerdLove: My Boyfriend Is Poly… And I’m Maybe Maybe Maybe Not

Dear Doc,

i will be 10 months into a relationship with a guy that is absolutely wonderful. Our company is suitable on almost every degree, the chemistry between us is amazing, he really loves my children from the past wedding, and we’ve been speaking about the likelihood of having hitched.

the thing is that he’s polyamorous and I’m maybe not.

he had been currently in a relationship with an other woman once we began dating, and their relationship has proceeded. He sees her roughly every single other weekend, although he wish to save money time along with her. He’s additionally available to other relationships developing later on. He has got been available and truthful about any of it right from the start.

i’ve no desire to be poly myself. This guy checks almost every package to my “want from a relationship” list. But after dealing with two divorces as a result of my lovers’ infidelity, dating a poly man *hurts*. Everytime he’s gone for the week-end, we proceed through fits of anxiety according to my worries to be kept for the next girl just as before. We generally speaking either lash away until he gets back at him(we’ve had some epic fights over text messages) or I completely emotionally shut down. I’ve told him just exactly how this impacts me personally, and while he knows this can be difficult for me personally, he claims he should not need certainly to alter whom he could be or just how he really loves because of my insecurities.

assist me, Doc. We don’t learn how to love a poly man without my worries tearing me personally aside. So what can i really do which will make this relationship work?

Bringing Regarding The Heartbreak

We hate to state this BotH but there aren’t likely to be any simple responses right here.

One truism about dating that everybody has to consider is there’s no thing that is such “settling down” without “settling for”. (više…)

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